Letting the baby cry would help his psychological training

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“No matter how attentive the caregiver is to be there and to respond at all times to what he thinks the baby needs, he will inevitably fail and it is necessary to make room for the lack, but one that does not put him or his survival at risk ”.

This is stated by Zaida Mayerly Mayorga Gualdrón, Master in Psychoanalysis, Subjectivity and Culture, from the National University of Colombia (UNAL), who carried out an exhaustive literary investigation, which allowed him to analyze and explain the fundamentals of the encounter between the caregiver (neighbor) and the baby (subject) and how necessary it is for the first to provide or not, instantly, the care provided to the child.

“Currently there are many manuals or guides that talk about the fact that you cannot let the baby cry, that you have to be there and before they scream you have to put the bottle, the breast or whatever their object of desire is. However, as caregivers we have to ask ourselves how good is that? ”, Says the researcher.

The baby’s cry plays a fundamental role, because although some may say that it is a call, from psychoanalysis it represents an encounter between the neighbor (the one who cares) and the child, who in turn is considered as a full child of tension that is exposed to different external stimuli.

According to the research, as a result of this tension, the tantrum, the kicking and the scream are generated, the latter is heard and interpreted in different ways. While it may simply be a noise, it can also be given different meanings.

These meanings are given by the caregiver (who is away) and can interpret it as hunger, sleep, thirst, cold, heat, among others, without this meaning that the baby is communicating any specific need.

“It may happen that the caregiver attributes a need to that cry and approaches and approaches the child as an object of this which may, for example, be the breast to feed him. For this reason, the investigation mentions that the cry is taken as a necessity, and whoever is outside reaches the object, which helps the baby to survive from the biological point of view. Although for psychoanalysis more than that is required ”.

Recognition and internalization

According to the literature, some investigations that explain that what happens with children in an internalization process, that is to say that for the caregiver the child must be more than a “bag or object” that requires care, but must be recognized as a subject, something that can influence the negligence or not of the care of the babies.

“Anyone can reach the bottle or give food, but for a subject to exist as such, that other (caregiver) is required to name it, and naming it means that there is another who recognizes that what is there, that baby, is a subject”.


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