This is how my husband deals with the fact that I don’t get pregnant right away

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This is how my husband deals with the fact that I don't get pregnant right away







© Shutterstock/Thiti2529



If it doesn’t work out with the baby right away, it can become a burden for the partnership. Here women tell about the support they get from their husbands.

The female body is not a machine. And every woman is different. It makes perfect sense that sex without contraception doesn’t mean having a baby straight away. But when pregnancy is a long time coming, many women begin to have doubts: Is it my fault? Is it because of him? What are we doing wrong? It is clear that this can be stressful – perhaps even during hormone treatment – and the partner is often an important support during this time. In the Urbia-Community women discuss what support they get from their husbands.

He can handle it better

One user reports that her husband can deal with setbacks better than she and offers a comforting shoulder. But that was a learning process.

Small gifts

Another woman writes that her husband cheers her up with all sorts of attentions: chocolate, shopping, a hot water bottle. It often comes down to the little things!

The optimist

One user has a man who has the positive attitude: “It will all work out!”, Who helps with the hormone injection and holds his hand. You can only wish for such a partner!

Better to talk to the friends

For another forum user, her friends are the most important conversation partners. Her boyfriend helps her but doesn’t talk much about the subject. That’s okay with her – she already got to know him as someone who doesn’t scream his feelings out into the world.

The “I don’t want to know” vs. the “I care” type

Just as a user is with a type of man who actually doesn’t want to know anything about the whole fertility treatment (he is not interested in the procedure and does not want to know the test results of the pregnancy test in order to protect himself from disappointment), so reports another User of the opposite. Your husband is fully involved in the procedure. For her, it takes two people to have children.

He was the driving force

There is also a completely different way of doing things: A woman says that her husband took the reins of fertility treatment and – if he could have – even taken the hormones for her.

The desire to have children is not a woman’s business!

The experiences of the users show how different men are involved in the fertility process. Ultimately, it is important to talk to your partner about the needs. If you feel alone or helpless, it is important to get support from your partner, if necessary by actively demanding it. Because one thing is clear: wishing to have children is not a woman’s business – and if we have to take on and endure all the physical things, it should go without saying that the partner should at least provide moral support!

Learn more:

In direct comparison: This is the greatest burden on mothers and fathers in the pandemic

Parent survey: that’s how crazy life changes when you have children

A baby under time pressure: How sprinter Cindy Roleder used the Olympic break for a child

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